It’s just a matter of time until we hear the word “sue” if someone feels they have been wronged. For much of my childhood, I grew up in a medical doctor’s family. The numerous lawsuits my stepfather and my adoptive mother were involved in over the years, as either the plaintiff or the defendant, seemed to be one way to handle life’s problems by always feeling the need to be right.
Can anyone possibly imagine how intimidated and powerless I then felt as an adult when my parents wouldn’t tell me the truth to why my birth certificate was mysteriously “lost”? Searching on my own for the answers had snowballed into an insurmountable mountain of more lies and secrets. Feeling alone, I had no one to turn to ask for help when they refused to answer any of my baffling questions in such a cruel game with a number of players. Legally, I didn’t know if I had any rights as an adoptee and besides I knew it was important to my adoptive mother and my stepfather to win at any cost.
I did lose out on the love and respect from my parents. But if I am honest with myself, can you lose something you never really had? No one should have to beg for the truth concerning their own life story. What I have learned from the painful, unfortunate experience is to never settle for less and that my being is/was worth so much more than any of the nonsense and deception.